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Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Chords of Courage Volume One, Live At The New Deal Cafe, cicada, Seasons (Chris Cornell cello cover), A Message In the Mess, Another Life/Another Live, A Gift For Saint Cecilia, Between Lover and Twilight, and 4 more.
1. |
Allergy
03:59
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All this scratching
has been getting me nowhere
thick skin etching
getting me high
thick skin blisters
and the blisters bled
no-one's listening
so no-one is fed up
finger finds purchase
and the paw's got to dig
tunnel down deep till all you see
is what you did
gotta have an allergy
to the world today
only way to explicate
what's been crossing my head
mile by mile we march
man by man we conquer
rabbit army rises
rage and armour
all this itching
has been getting me nowhere
all this wretching
just a little rabbit cough
thick skin shivers
and blisters soft
but digging hardens paws
and the feeling falls right off
the tunnel taught me all of
everything that it ought to
tunnel tunnels vision
most efficiently
gotta have an allergy
to feeling anything at all today
gotta have a thick skin thick skin
thick thick thick
mile by mile we march
man by man we conquer
rabbit army rises
rage and armour
someone was whining
about the price of gas today
someone was whining
about their twin SUVs yesterday
I remember 9/11
someone caught solidarity
gave blood gave Love
gave cash gave thanks
but I remember 9/23
suffering back to normalcy
he blamed Hussein
the gays and the gas tax
yeah - like that makes sense to me
all this bitching's
been getting me nowhere
all this rubbing
has been getting me high
it shouldn't be coming
as any great think
my thick skin is thinning
the blisters weep
breaking me in
that's best done swiftly
breaking me down
that could take some time
breaking out somewhere
that's what I've been thinking
killing them quickly
never crossed my mind
mile by mile we march
man by man we conquer
rabbit army rises
rage and armour
©2006 rob hinkal
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2. |
Bearclaw's Mule
04:28
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this city is built on the ashes of rats
you can grind them underfoot if you wish
thanks for the warning but I think I'll stay
I sit back and sprawl and stare at it all
a curtain in breeze it blocks me
I turn away from the window
with its lights and its gutters the city screams and she mutters
you turn over sleeping
you're catching light in a different way
seems I spend so much time just facing this wall
I don't know what I suppose this wall should do
Bearclaw dreams of saints in the city waiting
Bearclaw dreams of strength
she dreams up something better
Baltimore is built on the bones of rats
you can crack them underfoot if you wish
thanks for the warning but I think I'll just stand here
I sit back and sprawl and stare at the stars
with my hand on your back without feeling
did I stand too tall?
did I stand too firm?
did I listen to you?
did I listen to you at all?
on a night like tonight between thunder and light
North Ave is a war zone
the cops clean up when the shooting stops
on street level it's dog-eat-dog
but on the third floor we hoped and we prayed
we prayed for something better.
did I stand too tall?
did I stand too firm?
did I listen to you?
did I listen to you at all?
Bearclaw dreams of strength in the city waning
Bearclaw dreams of saints
she dreams up something better
© rob hinkal.
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3. |
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4. |
I Am the Wreckingball
05:46
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I am not mortar, I am mortal,
A force of destruction
about as cordial as a wreckingball.
A kiss like breaking brick,
that sickening feeling in your stomach.
Came seeking shelter and found
a splintered white picket.
A product of my raising,
build it and they will come praying
for restoration,
but I am no cathedral.
just broken and stained glass,
They say, have faith, and refuse to panic.
I don't want to be faithless! I don't want to be.
You dug this foundation by hand,
But it will be your grave - if you let it.
You can still leave this place,
Let this hole just fill up with rain
until there's nothing left of it all .
No, I am not the home you hoped for -
I am the wreckingball.
You said the ground was solid here,
I felt sand beneath me slipping,
And even as you lost your footing
You still promised spires
And strong stone arches, columns of marble,
But I swear it's most beautiful
when it's on fire.
chorus
How lovely the façade,
Such beautiful artistry.
And isn't a passionate lie
Kind of like honesty?
And I want to believe.
So tell me again:
It's not settling. It's not settling
chorus
© Heather Lloyd.
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5. |
Drift
05:34
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Please
don't fear for me
I'll get there snow or no
With a cure or with a blow
to end it all
This steed
Is trusted by me
I never learned to navigate such drifts
But blindness it is bliss
And my Love please don't forget
I'm a creature of such willful ignorance
Please don't kick
Please don't fight
Please don't leave my sight.
Hush
Don't run from me
I know what you've been honing
It takes skill to be alone on Christmas Eve
Oh
My wreath
Poisonous and wild
My crazy one my bitter child
I've been trained on pain and though it's draining
I think you might be worth the games you play
Please don't kick
Please don't fight
Please don't leave my side.
Sensuous and sly
You deemed me worth the night
Hair and skin and fingers in
The pain the grin the cramp and then
The freezing dawn
I couldn't save you
I don't know if I could turn the key again.
I don't know that I could turn the key again.
Please don't kick
Please don't fight
Please don't leave my sight.
Please
don't fear for me
I'll get there snow or no
With a kiss or with your wish
to end it all
This deed
Goes untrusted by me
I never learned to navigate such drifts
But blindness it is bliss
And my Love please don't forget
I'm a creature of such willful ignorance
Sensuous and sly
Lovely until light
Reddened eyes and hidden skin
Longing gaze and flight and then
The freezing dawn
I couldn't see you
I don't know that I should turn the key again.
©2006 rob hinkal
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6. |
Massacre
00:26
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7. |
Trouble
05:00
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The snow came fast
After all these lies and tired skies
She sent poetry and ice
and all the while
it blocks the roads
and drives me crazy.
not fast enough
slip and skid and sit and fall and taste me in your mouth
don't think too much
I'll drive you crazy
And the snow would snap and vanish
And sleet upon the flame
You know we're reflex and we're passion though we're trying to stay away
and oh how slow will all this burn me when you've tired of your game
it drives me crazy
so lay down all your arms and show those marks upon your back
and lay down cross your arms and hide your scars from me and laugh
we're shoving static at each other and you know we're mutilating facts
you know the weather looks so good when you pass
and wait
and keep your home from me
I'd burn it down
For the noise and all it's beauty
Just to see
If you were beautiful when angry
And I think you are
I'll give you time
I'll be leaving in the sun when the road is clear
I'll just pretend I never feared you
and I'll lie and say we're fine
just give me space
it's not a complicated question
I've dumped money in this engine
and dreams upon your fire so let it burn
let them say it's crazy.
and wait just wait
and leave your home for me
we'll burn it down
For the noise and all it's beauty
Burn it down
cause you're beautiful when angry
I think you are
and I drive you crazy.
© 2007 rob hinkal
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8. |
Matador
04:31
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I am a matador, my mother told me so
She brought the message to me all the way from San Francisco
She said, "Hold this cloak tight in your hands,
you're destined for achievement.
With it cut a swath through life and your path into the pavement."
I don't want to say I've lost my faith in swords and capes,
but my blood is just as red
and this matador is weary of winding and sweeping
in every direction, all this is just distraction
not real protection from the weakness inside.
This mirrored armor reflects the smiles of those who come to see,
But I'm not so sure as they who the casualty is supposed to be
If I never fight the fight the outcome can stay mystery
If you never were you always could have been
and I owe nothing to history.
Can't this battle wait for later, maybe never,
never's better, never's safer
I don't want to work this hard forever
I can omit, it's not an error,
but the fairer of two choices that are mine, not yours, to make.
Why try when effort begets more of the same?
Every day a new beast to fight to preserve my name.
What if I refuse, would horns still cut me and once cheering hands abuse?
I am a matador, my mother told me so
But how many bulls must I fight before I am allowed to go?
With every win my reputation only spreads and grows,
But one day I will miss a step and fall beneath the horns.
©2002 heather lloyd
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9. |
Satan's Claws
00:54
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10. |
We Must Be Ships
04:58
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You know in my heart, you're a stowaway
and though I've sent in the dogs,
I can't seem to make you go away,
In spite of all of the floods.
And I've asked Poseidon to find him who's hiding
safe on my last vintage of hope -
a drug deeper than water
held in something that floats.
And you are a barrel-rider -
the most tenacious kind.
And you are all promises,
and I am all wine.
Our chronicle littered with farewell dinners,
you topping off my glass
before we pass,
before we pass.
But all I taste is salt
when we kiss, when we kiss
the way we pass in the night
the way we pass in the night
we must be ships.
I flashed you a signal
you gave me a bow on your way through.
With all our appointments
it's all that we had time to do.
We love our traveling, though rigging's unraveling,
my canvas sails' getting torn.
Though I lead the way like a mascarone*,
I can't say II know where I'm going.
Chorus
I found your name
finger-written in sand,
last time I made land.
And I would leave you a note,
but I know
it won't last.
And you are a barrel-rider -
the most tenacious kind,
and you are all promises
and I am all wine
chorus
*Mascarone: Spanish for the figureheads on the front of wooden sailing ships.
© Heather Lloyd.
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11. |
Speaking Louder Now
04:59
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Angels never whisper when they're drunk
And they're never honest when they're sober
They open up their heart when they are heartless
And hide behind the ramparts when they are sober
And those angels will refrain from noting beauty
And they will refrain from noting harm
I bet those angels remark upon my beauty
The moment I am gone.
So lean and whisper while I'm here
Right in my good ear
I'll pretend that you'll remember.
Angels never know what they've been saying
They have no memory or so I hear
Just wings and songs and jangling keys
To things and places that I'll seem to always steer away from
Hunt myself something that I comprehend
Something that I can lay my fingers on please
Something solid and all-knowing
And something that I'm controlling not something that's controlling me
So please be solid while you're here
And touch away all my fears
I won't have faith in anything
But I'll pretend that you'll remember
Lea n closer
And leave it in my skin
Lea n closer dear
And scream
Lea n closer dear
Find the soft spot here
Yeah, hurt me if you have to
Just know that I am here.
I've been accused of being many things
Of leaving naught but shadows in my stead
Angels are soldiers all their years
and sometimes I think that they forget
that their kiss can drink so deep when you are high
And be just a thimble when you're sober.
So lean and whisper while you're here
Right in my good ear
Just say that you'll remember.
©2006 rob hinkal
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12. |
Crazy As A Good Thing
03:02
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No-one thinks that you're a good find
My friends all think that you're from Hell
But I don't think that you're a bad find
Though you are p rob ably from Hell
We all think you're crazy
And they Love to tell me so
But I can't see that as a bad thing
My friends say I'm crazy too
But I heard you had a hard day
You gave all you got to give
Not everybody sees
You're crazy as a good thing
I've heard that you're too young
But I know it's also said
I act too young, no attention span
I can't sit still and can't behave
I'm angsty, I'm frightened
I give all I've got to give
I keep nothing in reserve for this Life I'm supposed to Live
My Dad scared that out of me
But I heard you had a hard day
Not everybody sees
You're crazy as a good thing
Get a nice house
Nice yard
Nice fence
They say
Good job
Good try
Good dog
No
Not everybody sees
My crazy as a good thing.
©2006 rob hinkal
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13. |
Simile Blue
06:08
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I'm as free as a bird's wing
nailed to the ground.
I'm as light as a feather
weighed down.
Coat me in lead, I'm a statue -
I will nest among the gold leaf,
small and brown.
Blue. Blue. Blue.
They say there are lakes
you can't see across.
They say it's the place
birds go to be lost,
but I believe
there's a shore and a reward
for those willing to fly the course.
Blue. Blue. Blue.
Happy as a lark
without a laugh.
Boundless as the sky
held inside a glass.
A Pinocchio thrush
wishing on a fairy star,
to be real is all I ask -
And blue. Blue. Blue.
At night from the shelves
voices in the dark
tell me to stop dreaming,
and learn to love what I've got,
but I believe
I can soar - wasn't I born for it?
Or was I not?
Blue. Blue. Blue.
Birds fly.
Birds fly.
Why, oh why
can't I?
© Heather Lloyd.
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14. |
Bad Influence
00:19
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15. |
Sever
03:19
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You push me up against a wall
undress me like I was your own
pants first, no hesitation,
all this with our shirts still on
I want to walk on out
but your bedroom voice makes me just want you more
and this guilty conscience seems secondary
to being alone here on the floor
I want to cut you on out
razor your memories from my skin
but I'm the one who always bleeds
you don't feel anything.
Please, be careful with my sinner's heart for Heaven's sake
I seem impervious, but that doesn't mean that I don't still break This isn't that shiny, shrink-wrapped kind of love - we both know better - remember it's just a line: "You could wake up next to me forever."
Last night I could barely breathe
you with her in the other room
jealousy seems hypocritical
but I'm still tuned in to every moan
The carpet seems oddly like splinters
the walls betweeen seem paper thin
I imagine your hands upon her
does hers remind you of my skin?
I want to figure it out
where do you end and I begin
because I'm the one who always needs
you don't feel anything.
Please, be careful with my sinner's heart for Heaven's sake
I seem impervious, but that doesn't mean that I don't still break This isn't that shiny, shrink-wrapped kind of love - we both know better - remember it's just a line: "You could wake up next to me forever."
- Heather Lloyd
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16. |
Choke Cherry
05:51
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One more toy to take
they say it will not hurt him
they say they will treat him Lovingly
but they stay to suck the joy from him
suck it down suck it down suck it down
the way you finish fruit
it always leaves you hungry
One more toy for the boy
it's one more way
to make him pay
for all these things that he will never be.
One more joy to take
they say it will not harm her
they say she will give it Lovingly
they say it'll make her stronger
she's giving in
she's beaten back
she's fucking up
she's fighting back
she needs a tool and she needs it now
here's to uneducated labour
and some help from alcohol
no she don't need no time to hone him
she just needs to make him strong
I was born to be a weapon
I was born to be a saviour
I was born to be a comment
on some other guy's behaviour
I can run and jump and hide and climb and climb and climb
One more to toy to break
that thing is always screaming
the telephone is
off the hook
with creditors and debitors
and people with their dying needs
You're one more toy for me to flay
cause I am so much older than I ever thought I'd Live
to be
I was born to be a star
Some bullfighting hero
I'm here to save us all
and I'm sorry you ever had to see me fall
It's a 9mm automatic
it caught 20 in the back on the run
never thought a boy that young could have it
never thought a boy could be so dumb
you know you can empty those things in 7 seconds
maybe quicker if you're faster with your finger on the trigger
knowing no-one never ever need to leave this room alive
spit the clip
jack one in
check the mirror and shoot again
and shoot again
I hear revolution is the answer
to fight with all your might
both sides have got the ammo
both sides have got the right
we can take it street by street
slow just like a Lover
every man is an oppressor
every man is just a soldier
lock and load for peace man
it's just the fight I've always dreamed of
I was born to be a falling star
in the ring to save this failing world
and I'm sorry
yah I'm sorry
you ever had to see me fall.
©2002 rob hinkal
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ilyAIMY Baltimore, Maryland
ilyAIMY is a percussive acoustic rock animal hailing from Baltimore, MD. Mixing genres from rock to folk to soul to bluegrass; flavours as varied as jazz and hip hop curl through what is undoubtedly one of the most exciting sounds in today’s folk(ish) music scene. Instrumentation includes acoustic guitars, cello, djembe, cajon, Irish bones, keyboard, bass, drums & harmonies. ... more
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